Martine Pagé

Things I can’t do without a man

I like to think of myself as an independent person, so I become intensely frustrated when there are things I just can’t do without a man around:

– Opening most jars.
I am absolutely pathetic at opening jars. You should see me do a frustration dance when my pasta is ready and I can’t open a jar of sauce. A few years ago, before my then boyfriend left to work for 6 months in Europe, he made sure to buy me a Canadian Tire gadget to open jars. Well, I’ve managed to find a way to damage jar lids with that tool to a point where they become impossible to open, even by a man.

– Moving big objects.
Like a 27″ television which needs to be taken to the repair shop. Damn. The tv I inherited from my dad just died on me. I think it doesn’t like my shows and misses boxing and war movies.

– Understanding the plot of heist movies and mafia movies.
« Wait a second. Who’s that guy in the dark suit and the fancy hat? Didn’t he get shot at the beginning of the movie? Why are they mad at him? »

– Killing very big bugs (or for the sensitive hearts, catching them and releasing them in the wild).
I admit any woman brave enough will do, as long as I don’t have to watch while the bug is being squished.

– Making knots.
Like the ones used on a sailboat or the ones used to hang hammocks. Untying knots is even worse.

– Finding the most direct way out of a place.
Yes, yes, I fit the clich� of the « woman with no sense of direction ». But I don’t get lost when I travel on my own; I just don’t take the most direct way back to the hotel.

– Forgetting about a few extra pounds.
Or How I learned to stop worrying and love the curves.

The rest I can usually take care of myself. Or find a girlfriend to give me a hand… (no, I don’t mean it THAT way!)

Love in a vacuum

« It’s difficult to resist having affection for the Roomba, » she said. « I have been known to pat mine on the back and say ‘Well done,’ when he’s done for the day and did a good job. It’s just a cute little gizmo, what can I say? »

This woman, interviewed by Wired News, is talking about her vacuum cleaner, the Roomba. I talked about this machine – which cleans your floors while you’re gone – on the tv show I worked for last Fall (which is still airing until October), and it was the item that generated the most calls at the tv station. The producer told me that people still talk about it. The Wired News article says that owners give the vacuum cleaner pet names, and people feel sad when they have to send the machine to the repair shop.

« I do talk to Zoomer, » she said. « I talk back to him when he’s beeping…. Mostly I see him as a utilitarian pet I’m very glad to own. And we don’t have any other pets, so that says a lot. » A lot of people name their cleaner after Rosie, the robot maid in the Jetsons, or after their spouse. Other names include Dusty, Roswell and Linda Lovelace. No consensus seems to have been reached on whether it is male or female.

UPDATE

At the time I recorded the segment about the Roomba on television, the robot vacuum cleaner wasn’t available in Canada yet. I have finally reached the distributor for Canada. The product is now sold online via the distributor’s Web site, at the price of 200$ US. Infomercials across the country are also starting to sell the product and eventually, in the Fall of 2003, Canadian Tire stores and renovation/hardware stores should start selling the Roomba as well.

Note: I haven’t tried the Roomba myself, so this is not a product endorsement. I did read a lot of reviews from people who tested it though and the results seem very convincing.

Blogging is never having to say you’re sorry

Have you noticed how many bloggers are apologizing these days about not blogging often enough? Since it’s the end of June, one would think to blame it on the summer, but no, everybody is busy working their butts off.

If everybody is working so hard, who are all these people I see on the streets of Montreal during the day? Now that I am no longer a full time worker stuck in an office and chained to a desk, I’m always surprised to see how many people there are on the streets, in the shops, at the supermarket, or taking it easy in caf�s in the middle of the day! Are these people not working or are they on a flexible schedule? I sure was missing out on a lot when I stayed inside an office from 9 to 5 (well, with me, it was more like 10 to 7).